Dating is a crap shoot, you can only come out swinging and hope for the best. Beyond that its tough to try and divine the duration that your significant other will stick around. Luckily we have statistics to help us understand some of the more obvious scenarios. So for the purposes of betting, and betting alone, hopefully this list can help you stake money within your circle of friends on when that ill fated relationship will crash upon an iceberg and be claimed by the icy depths of the north Atlantic or a bout of unfaithfulness.

Chloroform corsage. Smooth

1. High School Sweethearts
-6 months 44% Six months is pretty far for teenagers, you'd have better luck trying to date some kind of badger than an 18 year old guy.
-18 months 16% This of course includes the customary triple breakup before the actual over arching meta breakup is finalized. Hold onto your hats, the first breakup is always the doozy.
-6 years 2% Congratulations you've grown apart. Good luck getting back out of this one.


2. Connected in college
-2 weeks 80% Hey that ain't bad. Some want to have "open relationships" until they're done savagely taking advantage of people, and some how manage hurting themselves. Enjoy your time while it lasts, you only have so much time left as an undergrad to sleep away bits of your soul. Men and women, you're all equally powered to play the field and sleep around.
-Semester and a half 13% Tragic, though during that semester away you had to break it off so you can be more open to the culture there. which is ironic because you end up spending most of your time hanging out and hooking up with other people from the states. -20 years 4% Hey you made it a long ass time.

Inspection of the fluid sample the professor dropped off in my mouth.

3. Graduate student love
-2 years 50% You fell in love with (were being banged by) your professor. Time's up, too bad so sad.
-Death to us part 50% You both love paleontology ... come on the chances are pretty astronomical.


4. Myspace
-1 night stand 60% Hey its the cesspool superhighway. Make sure you bring a towel and some holy water to clean up shop.
-Negative fifteen minutes 18% You were supposed to meet at a coffee shop and you caught a glimpse of the person sitting at a table and decided to run. Just to be safe you reported the person you were supposed to meet to homeland security for being a threat to national face pollution levels.
-A month 5% Listen, I haven't met anyone that has been for a month but come on there has to be a few people.

Seriously, it is an officially issued secrtary outfit, no I'm not playing.

5. Inter-office mingling
-Promotion 15% As long as you're not sleeping your way to the middle...
-3 years off and on 33% I can't believe your wife didn't pick up on you banging your secretary.
-10+ years 28% It can be a dangerous gamut dating in the office, the backfire could be devastating to careers, but sometimes it just works. Especially if no one injures any genitalia releasing all that pent us lust.


6. Met while clubbing
-Got a number, never calling it 41% That's the ticket.
-Sneak out after they fall asleep 30% Shhh, who cares if its not your sock, take it and run!
-At breakfast 26% You made it all the way to the next morning!


7. Online dating service
-For people under 35. 2 weeks 100% Its a world wide fuck-a-thon out there.
-For people over 35. Significant other at arms length till you die. 40% Some people don't want to die alone.

Love is in the air.

8. Sporting event
-20 minutes 15% Pretty intense team pride until you find out there second favorite team is the clippers. Come on, the clippers?
-5 years 20% You love love love going out to games with them, until you realize its the booze that's kept it going, and the repeated public drunkeness arrests open your eyes, that and the restraining order.
-Forever and ever 31% Go giants, fuck the dodgers.


9. Met on elimidate
-Spent load = hitting the road 100%


10. Arranged Marriage
-3 minutes 4% Rather than spend the rest of your life with the person you just met, you jump from the third story face first into a fire hydrant.
-2 years 28% Snored one too many times, stabbed in sleep with steak knives.
-Over 15 years 14% The hypnosis worked, I love my life partner and stopped smoking but now for some reason I wake up and seemed to have pulled large chunks of my hair out. "Cellar door"


11. Friends of Friends
-1.3 Minutes 27% You were set up on a blind date with someone you already knew, your friends are fucking retarded, get new ones.
-1 month 14% You manged to poison your social circle with your childish handling of a hook up. Great work dipshit.
-60 years 37% Really this is a good place to look, if you're serious that is. Lets all try and be adults about this. We all want to bone as much as the next person, so if we all approach it in a calm and orderly fashion we can all get some.